Trust your inner knowings. Rely on your own feels. No one else is hooked up to your sensory equipment. No one else receives the immediate wisdom of your soul. Your intuition speaks directly to you. Your heart is yours alone. Your life, your lessons, your timing, your truth. Other people may have an opinion, but ultimately, the only one that matters is your own.
Here's an alternative mindset I've been practicing whenever I find myself fearfully scrambling to figure it all out RIGHT NOW:
"I don't know how it's going to happen. I don't know how it's all going to work. I don't know how I'm going to get there. But I'm super excited to find out. "
This isn't the first time you didn't know the way. Yet, somehow you still managed to arrive. This time is no different. Stay open to being guided. Believe you will be shown. Rely on your intuition. Follow the path as it appears. Keep the vision. Take the steps. Trust the process.
"Impatience means I believe something’s not going to happen.“ -Joe Dispenza
“Those who are certain of the outcome can afford to wait, and wait without anxiety.“ -A Course In Miracles
I really liked this combo of quotes. Especially if we‘re talking about presence, patience, following the energy of the moment, and trusting in life as our co-creative partner. (And we‘re always talking about that).
Just going to leave them right here...
Maybe life isn't withholding anything from you after all. Maybe it's just waiting on your readiness and relying on your willingness to change so that it can set up all the important pieces, arrange meetings with the relevant players, and slowly prepare you for the part you hope to play, the things you'd like to experience, and the way you'd like to feel. Maybe you're right where you need to be in this process of alignment. Maybe life is actually supporting you with its timing as it orchestrates - and excitedly anticipates -your eventual becoming.
There really is an answer to every call, a deliverance for every request. It's real. It's resonance. Energetic. Scientific. What you are looking for is looking for you too. Just have to keep your mind clear enough to receive the guidance, your body tuned in enough to show you the way. What you are hoping to find, is hoping to be found. Just have to keep your eyes -and heart- open enough to recognize it when you do.
A guilt trip is not a mandatory voyage. People may invite you along but you never have to accept the offer. Trust your own intuition and where it's leading you. Keep moving in the direction that feels best for your soul. Like everything, where you go and how you go is just a choice. Your choice. So, choose you.
Every time I've tried to be someone else, when I've played into other people's expectations of me, or walked in a direction that did not feel authentic or true, I've been completely miserable. I was pleasing others, sure, but I was ignoring who I really was and could be. And every time that I have listened to my higher wisdom, when I followed the pulls of genuine curiosity, desire, and interest - when I did what was most loving for me even if it was really f*cking weird or different or sometimes nonsensical, even if it temporarily disappointed others because of what they needed me to be for them - I've discovered and attracted all kinds of joy, fulfillment, and magic. And I've also become a better daughter, sister, friend, and overall person because of it.
Guilt still comes up at times. But reminding myself of the principle "what is most loving for me is most loving for you" helps. It's not easy to move in your own often quirky and unpredictable way- to trust yourself enough to do so- but ultimately it's the most freeing thing one can do.
Just as important as what we are ready to say yes to, is what we are ready and actually willing to say no to. I've noticed that every time I want to move forward with something, life will bring me an out, or more of the same situations that I am used to.
In moments like this, it's almost as if life is offering up a little test, waiting for us to take a different action, giving us an opportunity to make a new and more self-supportive choice. A choice that feels good and true and freeing in the body. A choice that is made out of self-love and not out of self-sabotage or fear.
Sometimes we pass the exam, sometimes we don't. It's all ok. It's all about readiness. And we can't be what we are not. But I do know that each and every time that I've been up to the challenge, it's been these new positive choices and actions that have eventually led to entirely new conditions. Like magic.
These petals fell off some flowers sitting in a nearby vase. While rearranging them into a pretty picture, I had this thought come through: Things are never as awful or as hopeless as you tell yourself they are. Difficult? Yes. Challenging? Yes. Requiring you to sit with sadness, discomfort, regret, and/or loneliness? Yes. Asking you to release your need to control everything? Yes!!! But hopeless? If you are still breathing, the answer is no.
There's always another way to achieve the essence of what you are seeking, another angle to approach from, another purpose to serve. There's always something new on its way- something just on the horizon- that you are not yet able to fully see. Trust that it's good and it will be. Trust that you are moving towards what you desire to experience (and how you desire to feel) more and more each day. Trust and then let your petals fall where they will.
He “broke up” with me about 3 years ago. On the street. In front of a Señor Fish, 2 blocks from my house. I write “broke up” using quotes because we were never anything official during our summer-long involvement even though I loved him very deeply throughout our whole acquaintance, and perhaps well before we met.
I had believed that I was the only woman in his life, even though his hesitance in going anywhere outside either of our homes as well as his tendency to disappear for several days at a time, indicated otherwise. The connection was unbelievably strong, a soul-mating to a degree I hadn’t yet experienced. Sure, I may have only been focusing on his potential and ignoring his actions. But I loved him, there was so much magic and synchronicity and psychic-ness to the connection - how could this not be “the real thing?”
And yet, there I was, standing on the sidewalk, very much aware that he had made his choice and it wasn’t me; he was getting back together with his ex-girlfriend and they were going to start a family.
I walked to my house, tears streaming down my face, completely in shock over what was transpiring. It didn’t make any sense. My heart and soul had led me to him. How could it not work out? Why would I have brought myself such pain? How could this be happening to me?
As I approached my front door, I was met by nearly 50 crickets waiting for me on the porch. I say 50 but it could easily have been 100. The sheer number of them hopping and crawling around shook me out of my despair. Crickets always tend to bring blessings, an indicator of positive expansion and taking big leaps, especially in consciousness. Was this fantastic magical display supposed to comfort me, letting me know that somehow this awful heartache was a blessing?
When you’re in it, it’s so hard to see that what is happening is for your highest good. Looking back though, that is most definitely the case. While some soulmates are long-term companions, some are merely temporary catalysts to our next phase of self-expansion; opening us up to more self-love and freedom, assisting us in aligning with the authentic vibration of our soul.
In this way, what appears to be a heartbreak is actually just the precursor to a heart-breakthrough.
When we look at things from this angle, with enough space and distance and time, we can actually say it and mean it: Thank you, thank you, for not giving me what I thought I wanted. Because what I have received instead is so much better. Thank you for giving me the gift of myself.
I always start out making these little doodles as reminders for myself. When I feel the pull to share them I think it's because someone else out there needs the reminder too. I don't know who this is for but I hope it brings you a bit of relief and comfort. We aren't here to be copies of each other. We aren't here to live out what others project or expect for us. We don't have to live a life that doesn't feel true or authentic to our own being. We may get inspired by what others do and have, we might find similarities and points where we intersect, but overall our lives are uniquely ours. We get to draw and color them in as we choose based on what feels best to us and for us at any given time.
Surrender doesn't mean giving UP. It doesn't mean giving IN. It means giving WAY to the greater intelligence within your heart, your own inner light. It means connecting with your highest, truest, and freest self - that constant, eternal, unwavering part of your being that never changes, judges, or abandons you. It means listening to what it has to say and letting it lead you down the path, trusting that you are moving in the right direction, even if your current circumstances indicate otherwise. Your passions are always on purpose.
It's very easy to get overwhelmed. To have to do so many things, to be present for so many people, and to be in so many places at once. Obligations, responsibilities, daily tasks and chores. Our personal energies split, scatter, and are often depleted before the day is through.
Everyone I've talked to this week- myself included- has been feeling the repercussions of being constantly connected to the people in our lives- as well as the anxious buzz of the outside world. If we don't plug in our own rechargeable batteries first, before giving of our energy, we won't have much to give. If we don't center in our own unique selves first, we can feel lost, confused, and completely disconnected from our intuition. We won't be able to hear that vital inner voice- the one that always guides us in the right direction. Mine keeps reminding me: "go somewhere green and ground."
Even if it's just within your imagination. It really only takes 1 minute to plant your feet in the grass and to become aware of YOUR breath, YOUR body, and the fact that you are a human being (doing the best you can) on a spinning planet somewhere in space.
Self-care isn't selfish. It's essential.
In the midst of a life-altering shift, it's hard to believe that things are actually happening for us and that we are right where we need to be. As we free-fall into uncertainty, it can be difficult to trust where and even if we'll ever land.
If you find yourself floating in such a situation of confusion, if you're flying headfirst into foreign and unfamiliar territory, be as gentle and kind with yourself as you can throughout this process of transition. Know that at some point soon, you'll once again find yourself on solid ground. Remember that this is just a moment in the series of moments you will experience in a lifetime. It may very well be a pivotal point in your story, one which will undoubtably contribute to the wealth of knowledge, courage, and experience you will one day possess, as it helps you grow into the person you will one day become.
For now, remember that you are not alone in this struggle; help and support are much closer than you may believe. Find your footing beneath what is temporary. Connect to the timeless part of you. And let your future self guide you forward one step at a time.
Who or what outside of me have I been allowing to define me? To choose my identity? To limit my expression? To restrict what I believe is possible? To determine what I am here to do or be?
Today is a good day to ask those questions. And an even better one for consciously choosing to let go of whatever it is that may be holding you back.
While studying outside a coffee shop today, an errant and disturbing thought entered my mind regarding a situation I will most likely have to encounter in my future.
"What will I say? How will I handle it? Ughhh."
Despite a willful attempt to dive back into my book, the doomsday scenarios bounced around my brain. Within minutes my energy had flipped from zen to frantic. Then, almost as if on queue, perfectly timed as per usual, the Beach Boys song "Don't Worry, Baby" started to play from the speakers above my seat.
Worrying rarely produces a positive result. It doesn't do anything for you, except distract you from your path and disconnect you from your source. When we worry, we send out a silent message to the universe: "I don't trust you. I don't trust myself."
We might not always feel or see the support available to us, but it is there. And by opening up to this support, we can trust that we will always be guided to what is best for us at the time.
Worried/Fearful Ego: “What can I know about this upcoming shift in my life?”
Higher/Inner Guidance: “Get quiet. Be patient. All will arrive in time. Details don’t need to be arranged beforehand. All will be filled in accordingly, all in the natural unfolding of time and events. Some days you can feel “blah.” And it is more than ok. To be wherever you are is complete freedom. To not fear is the highest human pursuit. To surrender gracefully to the love ever-present. To stand on mountaintops unafraid of the fall. To trust that the landing, all landings, will be secure and arranged for you. Let go and follow my lead. Something good is always coming.”
It’s hard to know when following the pull of our intuition, if we are just being led to another bridge or if we are to arrive at a more permanent destination. We can ask, “is this the RIGHT ONE?” when referring to a new love interest, job title, or residence. Yet, does it even really matter? Perhaps it doesn’t matter as much when we remember our eternal nature. That we are constantly expanding and evolving souls having human experiences, and that our true power, value, security, and identity doesn’t come from the other people in our lives or the situations in which we find ourselves. That true solace never comes from the temporary. And that Life is always taking us where we need to go next.
When we come from this viewpoint, we can trust that it is always the “right one” for what we need “right now,” whether it lasts one day, one year, or for the rest of our lives. And the “right now”- this present moment- is all we’re ever really living anyway.
I'm so tired of my anxieties about the future. I'm so exhausted by my need to figure it all out right now. Ughhh. Right??
I keep hearing "how much can you trust me? That is how much I can reward you."
Sooo ok. Here goes:
Today I put my trust in divine timing. I hand over all my worries and fears. I throw my hands up in a stance of peaceful surrender. I lovingly let go of my doubt. I open up to the perspective that all that happens to me, happens for me. That all is good and all is necessary. All is purposeful. I trust you, life. I trust where I am now and I trust where I am headed. I trust I am supported and will be guided every step of the way. I trust that I am always right where I need to be.
Ridge’s meaning: “the top or crest of something”
View’s definition: “a sight or prospect”
Crow’s message: Change, it is who you are and what you do. Transformation is unavoidable. Transitions are inevitable. Excitement and discomfort are your guides. You’ve asked for more. So let it come. Let it arrive as a surprise. Let it surpass your expectations. Trust in life’s magical and miraculous way of taking you where you’ve always wanted to go. Keep moving forward. Keep looking up.
Underneath words and actions, live true intentions. The truth is always present, expressing itself as an undercurrent of energy, hidden beneath surface appearances. We are all energetic beings and can sense if there is a discrepancy between what someone is claiming to be and where they are really coming from. We can also sense when there is a natural resonance and ease, when someone is being genuine and authentic. Notice what you feel drawn to. Recognize when you are naturally repelled. Our bodies often know before our minds do. Trust the vibes you get from people.
"Intuition is a moment to moment tracking of energy as life is being created." - Sonia Choquette