Creativity is a process. Healing is a process. And you can only ever be where you are in the process. Some days you want to do cartwheels. Some days you want to hide under your coffee table.
Either way, it's all fine. You're walking a path. Be wherever you are on the path. It's more than ok. It's necessary.
Who or what outside of me have I been allowing to define me? To choose my identity? To limit my expression? To restrict what I believe is possible? To determine what I am here to do or be?
Today is a good day to ask those questions. And an even better one for consciously choosing to let go of whatever it is that may be holding you back.
"Expect good things."
I heard this phrase today and it hit me just how simple and freeing that would be. Why not leave the house expecting good things to happen to you? Why not enter into a situation assuming something good will come from it?
I don't know about anyone else but I'm soooo exhausted from all the mental, emotional, and physical energy it requires to be on the defensive all the time, awaiting the next calamity, dodging the next disaster. Ugh. Enough already. Fear doesn't have to be our default setting. We don't have to keep anticipating and reliving our wounded pasts. If we aren't in control of the greater universe, but only of our personal will and point of view- if what we focus on grows- why wouldn't we choose to trust, pay attention to, and EXPECT the good in every situation? Why wouldn't we give ourselves this gift?
It is very tempting to close one’s heart in the wake of romantic disappointment. It is very natural to place blame, to judge the other person as wrong, to get stuck in the whats and hows. To search for the whys. To feel hurt. Confused. Frustrated. Powerless.
Yet, in truth, we are never powerless. There is always something to gain, something to act on. There’s always a lighter perspective we get to choose. Our power comes from our ability to make this choice. To look through and above the circumstance. To stay open. To not close down our own hearts as a result of another’s actions. To avoid falling into the traps of cynicism. Because in being the energy of openness, in being unconditional love, we get to experience it. We get to release ourselves from the limiting confines of pain-induced judgment. And we get to walk in a gentler world of our own choosing, one of freedom, ease, hope and infinite possibility.
The kind of love that we’re usually hoping to find in relationship - the unconditional and unwavering kind- is always available to us. It’s always a choice we can make.
Having a desire is one thing. Becoming the version of yourself that is capable of achieving/attracting/receiving that desire is another. It is all about what we are being. It is all about matching the energy of our intended outcome. And then ofcourse, believing in our ability to co-create with all that is. Letting go into the unfathomable infinity of possible and potential paths to its manifestation. And trusting the process without needing to predict how or where out of fear. It is all in our becoming. It is all in our strength of belief. It is all in our surrender to this magic.
“The Quantum Field responds not to what we want. It responds to who we are being. Since every potential in the universe is a wave of probability that has an electromagnetic field and is energetic in nature, it makes sense that our thoughts and feelings are no exception. The thoughts we think send an electrical signal out into the field. The feelings we generate magnetically draw events back to us. Together, how we think and how we feel produces a state of being, which generates an electromagnetic signature that influences every atom in our world. This should prompt us to ask, “what am I broadcasting (consciously or unconsciously) on a daily basis?” - Dr. Joe Dispenza
Today I will not restrict the flow of love. I will not withhold it based on condition. I will not temper it because of fear. I will appreciate and be appreciated. We can't expect to have what we aren't willing to be, can't expect to receive what we are not willing to give.
I keep hearing, "What are you willing to risk in order to feel the way you want to feel?" Today I'm staying open and feeling free.
Reality is not a fixed concept. There is no "way it is." We will see what we want to see. Always. We can find evidence for whatever we want to prove. For better or for worse. We may forget that the things we hold as truths and absolutes are just points of view. They may have been inherited, adopted, or silently absorbed from society. We may have chosen our perspectives unconsciously but we are not stuck with them. We always have the choice and privilege to consciously change our outlook if we don't like how life is appearing to us. We are not powerless or predestined for failure or unhappiness.
Sometimes it takes a bit of digging and introspection and effort to uncover what we expect, assume, or believe about ourselves, other people, and the world we live in. But it's sooooo worth it. How else do we change shit up, let go and feel better? How else do we get free?
Words create worlds. Pay attention to what you think and say. The words we use to describe ourselves and our surroundings are powerful. The words we use are often indicators of what we believe is possible. And we are always co-creating our lives and magnetically attracting experiences based on what we truly believe. You want to see something, you will! For better or for worse. Words can be excellent clues and useful tools. Because perception is everything. The words that we release from our brains and let loose from our mouths declare to an always responsive universe what we desire to see more of.
I used to say jokingly "the fantasy is always better than the reality." And that was really true for me. I didn't want it be but it was. Then I decided to start saying "reality is better than any fantasy ever was or could ever be." And before I knew it, that became true. We can lock ourselves up in tiny prisons or we can free ourselves into unlimited possibilities. Lucky us. It's our choice!
This crew made me stop and take note. Omg gorgeousness.
Sometimes I can't believe how I walk in the world now. The things that jump out at me now versus then. My younger self would have completely ignored this beauty. She probably would have tossed her cigarette butt on this sidewalk in a frenzy of anxiety or a cloud of melancholy and sped off on her way to nowhere in particular. She had no idea what was right in front of her the whole time. Man, am I thankful for her. Without the dark we can't recognize the light. Contrast can be so vital to appreciation. The funny part is I'll probably say the same thing about me now in another 10 years.
I grew up hearing “you are what you do.” And while I always believed that to an extent, it also makes me think: what about the not so good things I’ve done? Like the stuff I did out of ignorance or lower levels of awareness, when I didn’t know any better? The moments where I was such a judgmental bitch to myself and therefore to the people around me? The times I closed my heart to others out of fear? All the bad, the embarrassing, and the regrettable... am I that??
The answer from my higher guidance: Do you still want to be?
The best part of having self-awareness -the beauty of being able to look back - is in remembering that all that we’ve been before has gotten us to this moment now. And in this moment, we always have a new opportunity to know better, to do better, and in a sense, to be better. New days, new leaves, new turnings.
Whenever you notice a dip in your mood or a sudden negative reaction to a situation or conversation, ask yourself a series of questions:
“What are the facts about what just happened?”
“What am I telling myself this must mean about ME?”
“Why am I using this as an excuse to be such an a-hole to myself?”
Events and circumstances happen and we cannot always change or control them. But we always have the ability to draw our own conclusions about them. There’s the objective facts about what happened and then there’s the subjective meaning we place on it. There’s what went down, and then there’s what I’m telling myself about it- what I’m allowing this event to prove to me about myself. And we can use the situation to prove anything we want. Positive or negative.
Often, we have believed something about ourselves for so long that it just feels like it’s reality. Like it’s just the “way it is,” the one and only truth, an indisputable fact. “I am like this...” “I always...” “I can’t because I never...” And yet, if it’s something you are telling yourself about anything, if it’s a spin on a certain person, place, or thing, based on what’s been observed before - then it’s not a fact. It’s an opinion. It’s a thought that you have practiced enough til you could play it by heart. It may be reinforced by others, it may be a conclusion that many people could find evidence to support, but you are the one who has the final say. You decide what is true about you.
Remembering that we are all continually creating the meaning in our lives and that we have the inherent freedom to do so is... incredibly freeing. It’s just you up in that beautiful brain of yours. Your perception. Your point of view. Your choice.