Today I will look in the mirror without criticizing my appearance; wishing this or that was smaller/bigger/tighter. I will not reject any reflection of this holy body, the current home of my soul. I will release myself from the clutches of popular opinion, remembering that trends are ever-changing, that standards can be optional, and that perspective is merely a choice. I will say goodbye to old habits of self-criticism. I will welcome the euphoria of self-approval and the personal power that can only come from self-appreciation. I will recognize the purpose in my uniqueness and the miraculous magic of the human form.
And I will revel in my freedom.
Nothing is personal. How people behave is based on whatever they’ve got going on with them. Everyone has their own insecurities, stressors, triggers, anxieties, and challenging life circumstances. We’ve all got our own burdens. Light or heavy, we’re all carrying something with us into our daily interactions.
Just because someone else’s treatment of you is not personal, doesn’t mean you should ignore your emotional reaction to the situation. Spiritually bypassing a negative emotion is only prolonging the inevitable. Often the best way out is through. Emotions are energy in MOTION. They want/need to move. Whatever arises within you, face it, feel it, forgive it, and let it work its way through your system. Never underestimate the healing power of a 5 minute ugly-cry.
Everything is purposeful. Take whatever time you need to emotionally process. When you’re ready and able to, take the focus off of your reactionary self. Look through and above the situation, from the highest vantage point possible. Ask your wisest self (who already knows): what is this really about? What is the opportunity for me here? What awareness have I gained? What has this situation inspired in me? What new choice can I now make? What new energy can I be? What new actions can I take? And what kind of lasting positive change can I hope to experience in MY life as a result? Move forward accordingly.
Focusing on the good won't make you some naive Pollyanna. It doesn’t mean you are unaware or not awake. No, it means you are confident in your divine birthright as a conscious co-creator on this planet. It means you are aware of your ability to affect change and to work with the natural universal laws to make things better for yourself and for everyone. It means you know that you are magic. And you know that working your magic means reaching for the highest possible thought and focusing on the love and the light - the divinity - within all things. This is the truth of who you are - of who we all are. And it will always bring us back to a place of peace and harmony.
Just as important as what we are ready to say yes to, is what we are ready and actually willing to say no to. I've noticed that every time I want to move forward with something, life will bring me an out, or more of the same situations that I am used to.
In moments like this, it's almost as if life is offering up a little test, waiting for us to take a different action, giving us an opportunity to make a new and more self-supportive choice. A choice that feels good and true and freeing in the body. A choice that is made out of self-love and not out of self-sabotage or fear.
Sometimes we pass the exam, sometimes we don't. It's all ok. It's all about readiness. And we can't be what we are not. But I do know that each and every time that I've been up to the challenge, it's been these new positive choices and actions that have eventually led to entirely new conditions. Like magic.
To give a gift, to send love, support, and admiration to another without expectation of how and even if it is going to be received is to experience the incredible freedom of unconditional love. It's to lead with compassion and to remember that nothing is personal. That another being's inability to respond to you as you'd hoped they would says more about them than it ever has to about you. It's to let go of another's power over you. It's to affirm the truth that no other living being is the source of your joy. It's to open your heart even more. And by doing so, you, the giver, unintentionally receive your own gift.
Old goal: to be happy all the time regardless of circumstances.
New goal: to be present and patient with whatever arises within me, to practice self-care over self-rejection, to no longer shame myself for any ugly or unpleasant thoughts and emotions, to not force a state of being that does not feel authentic or true, to sit with what is and to listen.
Old goal: happiness
New goal: freedom
Last night I had a dream that I was running down the street; trying to make my way to the house of a couple whose lifestyle I admire. I've never met them in real life, but have been so inspired by their story through their blogs and podcasts. It's almost as if discovering them two years ago allowed me to rediscover a part of myself and the kind of life I really want to live. And so somewhere along the way, they must have become a symbolic representation of the future I've been working towards. In the dream, I felt like I could not run fast enough. I kept trying to push myself harder, but my pace remained a steady jog, instead of a sprint. I heard some threatening noises coming from across the street. I just HAD to reach my destination. I bumped into other people who crossed my path. I kept going. Kept trying to increase my speed. I had to get there and quick! And then before I could even make it, I woke up.
Sometimes dreams can be the most precious gifts of self-awareness. To attach a sense of solace or personal fulfillment to a future destination or temporary object is to forget the significance of the daily journey. It is to miss out on all the potent opportunities to meet life fully, to free ourselves through presence and to evolve through self-acceptance. We may be putting so much pressure on ourselves to get THERE, yet it is only ever HERE - in surrender to the truth of the moment - that a deeper sense of personal peace, healing, love, and sustained fulfillment can be found. The desires we have for the future are necessary for direction, motivation, and positive action. Our goals keep us moving toward more experiences of freedom and of joy. Yet, it's only in the NOW, that we ever get to feel it.
These petals fell off some flowers sitting in a nearby vase. While rearranging them into a pretty picture, I had this thought come through: Things are never as awful or as hopeless as you tell yourself they are. Difficult? Yes. Challenging? Yes. Requiring you to sit with sadness, discomfort, regret, and/or loneliness? Yes. Asking you to release your need to control everything? Yes!!! But hopeless? If you are still breathing, the answer is no.
There's always another way to achieve the essence of what you are seeking, another angle to approach from, another purpose to serve. There's always something new on its way- something just on the horizon- that you are not yet able to fully see. Trust that it's good and it will be. Trust that you are moving towards what you desire to experience (and how you desire to feel) more and more each day. Trust and then let your petals fall where they will.
I used to think I had to do big things to change the world, that I had to be "someone" to really have an effect, to really make a difference. But separation is an illusion. Everything we do is a contribution to the collective. All thoughts, all prayers, all daily actions taken out of love. You don't have to be someone in order to make a huge impact. You already are. You already do.
Sometimes I forget that there is no one else out there preventing me from feeling how I want to feel. I am the storehouse of my resentments, the holder of my anger, the keeper of my judgments, the defender of my limitations, and the perpetuator of my dissatisfaction. I am the guardian of my beliefs, the thinker of my thoughts, the director of my attention, the curator of my perceptions, the authority on my actions, and the one who wields the power of my will. I am the one who chooses. I am the only one responsible for my happiness.
Sometimes I forget just how much is up to me.
Give another person your full attention today. Put down your physical distractions. Tune out your mental ones. Actually listen to what the other person is saying. Hear their words and the spaces in between. Hold the space for their authenticity. Be open, be patient, be compassionate. Attempt to understand their point of view.
I know, multitasking seems to be a necessity these days. We've all got a million super important things that need to get done and we seem to allllways be short on time. Yet, taking a few minutes to be fully present with another person is a huge gift. For both parties. Because, in truth, we all want to be acknowledged and accepted for who we are- for who we really are. We all long to be understood. We all want to feel valued. And we all benefit from soulful connection.
Be present with another soul today. Allow them to feel seen and heard without judgment. Remind them of who they really are underneath surface appearances and chosen identities. Remind them with your undivided attention. Remind them of their importance. Remind them that they matter.
So often we are sleepwalking through this existence without recognizing how magical the seemingly mundane really is. Everything within our world is alive and speaking to us. If we allow it, that is. If we can open up to this constant communication we can fully appreciate its beauty and receive its gifts. These sights can wake us up from our ordinary humanness. They can connect us to something bigger - to the essence of who we really are - beyond our monotony. They can remind us of our eternal nature, our responsibility, our greater purpose and our connection to everything everywhere.
Popularity doesn't always prove talent. It doesn't indicate value or worth. The chase after fame is a perpetual one, a never-ending dance with dissatisfaction. How completely exhausting.
A solution? Just put your focus on the work. Make your art. Keep following your joy. Be yourself. With or without the outside validation. In this world there is so much extraordinary existing within relative obscurity. Be extraordinary. Focus on what you're here to do- what you love to do- and do it. Have fun. And don't worry about the rest.
He “broke up” with me about 3 years ago. On the street. In front of a Señor Fish, 2 blocks from my house. I write “broke up” using quotes because we were never anything official during our summer-long involvement even though I loved him very deeply throughout our whole acquaintance, and perhaps well before we met.
I had believed that I was the only woman in his life, even though his hesitance in going anywhere outside either of our homes as well as his tendency to disappear for several days at a time, indicated otherwise. The connection was unbelievably strong, a soul-mating to a degree I hadn’t yet experienced. Sure, I may have only been focusing on his potential and ignoring his actions. But I loved him, there was so much magic and synchronicity and psychic-ness to the connection - how could this not be “the real thing?”
And yet, there I was, standing on the sidewalk, very much aware that he had made his choice and it wasn’t me; he was getting back together with his ex-girlfriend and they were going to start a family.
I walked to my house, tears streaming down my face, completely in shock over what was transpiring. It didn’t make any sense. My heart and soul had led me to him. How could it not work out? Why would I have brought myself such pain? How could this be happening to me?
As I approached my front door, I was met by nearly 50 crickets waiting for me on the porch. I say 50 but it could easily have been 100. The sheer number of them hopping and crawling around shook me out of my despair. Crickets always tend to bring blessings, an indicator of positive expansion and taking big leaps, especially in consciousness. Was this fantastic magical display supposed to comfort me, letting me know that somehow this awful heartache was a blessing?
When you’re in it, it’s so hard to see that what is happening is for your highest good. Looking back though, that is most definitely the case. While some soulmates are long-term companions, some are merely temporary catalysts to our next phase of self-expansion; opening us up to more self-love and freedom, assisting us in aligning with the authentic vibration of our soul.
In this way, what appears to be a heartbreak is actually just the precursor to a heart-breakthrough.
When we look at things from this angle, with enough space and distance and time, we can actually say it and mean it: Thank you, thank you, for not giving me what I thought I wanted. Because what I have received instead is so much better. Thank you for giving me the gift of myself.
Yeah, the world feels like a kinda crazy, kinda scary, rapidly shifting place right now. What has been helping me, among other things, is to think about how much awareness is being gained, how much compassion is being activated, and how many people are waking up. To think about the potency of this time period. About how much good we can really do. Even our "small," daily, intentional prayerful moments have an effect.
Despite being on a lovely family vacation, I've been feeling and processing these heavy collective energies, anchoring in the deeper truths and affirming the highest visions of balance. After all, we are co-creators on this planet of cause and effect and what we focus on grows.
Possible Q's: Why would I try to do what so many other people are doing and have already done? Does the world really need another___?
Pertinent A's: Yes, there may be others on a similar path, with a similar style, all sharing a similar picture of success, but there is no one else in the world that is exactly like you. No one else has lived your unique combination of experiences and can bring to your endeavors exactly what you bring. No two people are the same.
If you are pulled by joyful curiosity, genuine interest, and heart-felt desire, then there must be a reason for it. Even if you don't know what it is yet. Trust it and move forward at your own natural pace, in your own natural way. Each of us has a variety of roles to play, messages to share, people to reach, and services to provide. We're all interconnected, all a part of a much larger incomprehensible picture. So, how can you, in your limited human awareness, ever really know what the world actually needs?
Maybe it needs just the thing you've been holding back from it.
I'm currently working on a resource for energetically sensitive individuals. It feels... necessary. Sensi-identifying or not, as humans we are all empathic. And it's usually when we are unconscious of our own sensitivity and natural empathic response, when we do not recognize our responsibility in maintaining our own energetic boundaries, that we get swept up in the vibration of another. We may also become incredibly susceptible to getting caught up in a collective energetic movement, especially the movements that are rooted in fear and negativity. Fear and negativity will not aid you on your mission to change that which needs changing. Fear and negativity will deplete you. You are no good to the world when depleted. The world needs your authentic spark. The world needs your hope-based thoughts AND positive actions.
One quick tip: Plug into your true source before your news source. Before you let another temporary entity set the tone for your day, set your own. Whatever your spiritual practices are- meditation, yoga, exercise, nature walks, chakra clearing, earthing, time with your pet, mindfully brushing your teeth and just breathing - whatever it is that reconnects you to your own center, do that first. Do it before turning on the TV, checking your newsfeed, putting on the radio, etc. It's important to be informed but it's more important to stay empowered.
Sometimes, mid-prance, my dog Remy will abruptly stop and sniff the air. Following her nose to the apparent source of her intoxication, she'll attempt to walk back the way we came, pulling me with her in the process. My usual response is, "come on, Rems. We move forward, not backward. You want treats? Let's get some treats!" This is always effective.
I actually use the same technique on myself, whenever I feel the pull to relive my past or replay my worst/greatest hits. Yes, the past was necessary. You wouldn't be where you are now without it. Yet, you do not need to go back there. You can't physically go back there. And would you really even want to? Thank the ground you've already covered. Feel the spot of earth that is currently beneath your feet. And walk in the direction of your future destination, where an infinity of possibilities - and treats - await you.